Allow Me to Introduce My Sneaky Bitz (Lessons in Self Love)

Allow me to introduce Sneaky Bitz.  You might already know Sneaky Bitz.  You see, Sneaky Bitz is that aspect of me (or you) that tries to sabotage things in life… and often, Sneaky Bitz does this in a sneaky way – sometimes to the point that we are not even aware of it.  If I’m not paying attention, Sneaky Bitz might succeed but I’ve gotten pretty good at playing Sneaky Bitz’s game.  Ha!

For example, I woke up this morning and it felt like every muscle in my body ached.  My Sneaky Bitz tried to convince me that I could baby myself and stay home from Ashtanga yoga practice, reasoning that I’m tired, I hurt, I’ve worked hard and I deserve a break, right?!  All valid arguments, right?  Why not pamper myself a little for a change?  Ha!

Coconut2So you know what I did?  I said, “nuh-uh.  Not this time, Sneaky Bitz!  I caught you!  Haa ha ha!  Nice try!”  Then I got my butt up out of bed and I went to Ashtanga practice.  On the way home, I treated myself with the nourishment of a fresh young coconut (one of nature’s best source of electrolytes).  Then I cleaned my yoga mat and let it, and me, soak up the sun for thirty minutes.  After that, I stepped up my game.

You see, part of the reason for the physical pain is because some areas of my body are weak.  So, I treated myself farther by doing 280 various forms of crunches and 296 reps of various leg lifts.  Then, thanks to my lovely roommates, I treated myself to some home-made Sambar with home-grown lentil and mung bean sprouts!  Take that, Sneaky Bitz!

Actually, you have to be kind to Sneaky Bitz, because it is a part of you.. almost child-like, you have to teach it new ways to be 🙂  Sneaky Bitz is your friend.  Ha ha ha ha.

Truth is, although it sounded good at the time, had I rolled over and went back to sleep, I would have felt really bad about myself later and my practice would have suffered.  If you’re wondering how I do it or how I get the strength or motivation in moments like this, you’re not alone; a friend recently asked me the same thing. It can be defined with two words:  Self Love. But how do you love yourself?  What is Self Love?  Ah… multi-million-dollar questions, each with a several-part, multidimensional answer.

Check out this quote I posted on my Facebook page:

SelfLove

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, I asked myself this morning, “If I really, truly love myself, then would I allow myself to go back to bed, knowing the negative consequences?”  The answer was a re-sounding, “NO!”.

If that question doesn’t resonate with you, then try this technique that I used to use as my gauge.  Change the context of the question and ask yourself, “If my best friend were in this situation, what would I advise him or her to do?”  It’s a powerful question that lends us the ability to see the situation through a different lens.  For most people, put in the context of someone other than ourselves (especially someone we admire, respect and love), the answer is easily accessible.

Once, I sat in a car with two young adults (in a relationship) arguing over who had hurt who the most.  After the young woman poured her heart out to me, relaying all of the ‘wrongs’ her boyfriend had done over the past three years, I was astounded that they were still together.  What’s more, I could clearly see that this girl lacked self love.  So I gave her the magic question.

I said “You love and respect your best friend dearly, right?”

“Yes”, she replied.

“Okay.  If your best friend were in this situation, what advice would you give to her?”

She said, “I’d tell her to end the relationship immediately and leave his sorry ass!”

“Then why do you not love and respect yourself enough to do the same?”, I questioned.

A still silence consumed the vehicle and the rest of the ride was very quiet.  You see, in all truthfulness, this man had treated her very wrong, but I couldn’t tell her that.  It’s something she had to see and figure out for herself.  Her Sneaky Bitz was making excuses for this guy and, up to that point, she was convinced that they belonged together in a relationship.  The next day, she left him.

Do you have a Sneaky Bitz?  What questions or techniques do you use to over come it’s grasp?

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2 comments

  1. Amber Lane says:

    Nap time. I am a stay at home mom and I am so blessed… every day my son takes a 2 hour nap. As soon as he is asleep my Sneaky Bitz says, “You’ve chased him around all morning and cleaned and done so much, he keeps you awake at night when you should be asleep, go ahead and take a nap.” Every so often this is a voice of reason and I really didn’t get enough sleep and I really DO NEED a nap. So I nap. Most days, however, this is just Sneaky Bitz giving me an excuse to be unproductive. You see, nap time is my most productive time of day. In 2 short hours I can get product made for our Etsy shop, work on posts for the store, make lunch, dinner, snacks, clean the whole house, research or update the playlist for my next yoga teaching gig, and take a shower. I can get a lot more done than that too, just watch me. OR I can take a nap. Trust me, I feel a lot better when I get things done. The family dynamic works better when I get things done. And when things are done and that baby wakes up, we get to celebrate with lunch and a walk to the park.

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